Rudrani’s Last Days
by
Sananda Dasa
(Rudrani's Husband)
Dear Devotees, family and friends
Hare Krsna,
Please accept my humble obeisances. All glories to Srila
Prabhupada.
Several devotees, friends and family of Rudrani devi dasi have
asked me and Shanta for details about Rudrani’s last days of life
and how she left her body so I thought of writing something for
everyone’s knowledge.
Nov.1, 2006 Rudrani had a kidney failure due to complications
from a bowel surgery following an illness of several months.
The doctors attending her felt that she would not survive that
night but to everyone’s surprise her vital signs came to normal by
midnight, although her kidneys continued to fail. Her mind and
consciousness was not at all affected. She remained alert.
Myself and her doctors told her that there was no treatments
possible and she may leave her body anytime from now on.
She discussed all the medical details with her doctors clearly,
without fear. She was very calm. The next three days she spent most
of her time with her family mainly with Shanta, two brothers, two
sisters and myself. Individually and together she talked to us. She
talked to all of us without any fear, sadness and with clarity. She
was frequently consoling us from crying and was constantly giving us
courage.
As of Nov. 1st we had begun a 24 hour vigil with her.
The following nights when
Shanta ,who was doing the night shift, Rudrani discussed each and
every detail of what to do with her things and gave Shanta guidance
for her future. She especially requested her to please take Krsna
Consciousness very seriously. She also discussed how her body should
be dressed and what dress to wear, what makeup to do, for her own
funeral, without any sadness or fear. She discussed with myself all
financial matters and how to make the funeral arrangements ( the
cremation of her body and what to do with her ashes etc.)
One night Rudrani told Shanta very firmly that death is not at
all scary, it is very easy, especially if someone is there to hold
the hand and help. She requested Shanta to do that for her. Shanta
had been her companion, friend and care giver for the last 23 years.
Nov. 7th myself, Rudrani and her doctors discussed
together and we decided to remove all her medical supports like IV
fluids etc. and to start palliative (hospice) care, which means she
would receive only treatments which gives her physical comfort by
managing her pain and breathing difficulties. She continued her
mental and intellectual clarity to discuss details with everyone and
give comfort to all without worrying about herself.
Nov.9th afternoon Rudrani was moved from the acute
care unit to the palliative care unit at the same hospital
(Vancouver General Hospital). While she was being moved to the
palliative unit she thanked her nurses and everyone around "I’m
going to the "take off" unit" she said with a smile and her usual
humor.
Since Nov.5th she had been calling all the relatives,
devotees and friends (her brother Jim was arranging with his cell
phone) to say good bye. Devotees from Vancouver temple were also
visiting her. She was her cheerful self comforting and wishing them
all well.
On Nov.9th evening 9:00pm all the family members left
her for the night as usual after having spent all day with her. AT
10:00 pm myself, Shanta and her nurse proceeded to give her a full
sponge bath and changed her clothes and her bedding..
Shanta put on Rudrani her new Tulasi neck beads and pinned on her
a Narasimha pendant. Then we applied dust from Vrindavan and
Mayapura ,water from Vrindakund was applied to her body, The
Narasimha Kavacha storta was placed under her pillow . Maharani dasi
(who has been Rudrani’s next door neighbour for 17 years at the
Vancouver temple devotee housing facility) helped to tape Tulasi
Maharani’s gopi form picture (10x17) to the overhead TV screen
directly facing Rudrani.
A large picture of Their Lordships Sri Sri Radha Madan Mohan and
Srila Prabhupada along with the printed words of the Hare Krisna
Maha Mantra was placed on the wall in front of her.
Mother Maharini and I left the hospital at
11:00pm. Shanta stayed with Rudrani .
Shanta sat next to her bed, holding her hand.
Rudrani fell asleep at around 11:30 pm.
At 2:00 am Rudrani was sleeping, waking up she
called Shanta. She began
coughing and asked Shanta for some water as she
was thirsty. Shanta gave her
some water and Rudrani said she was not able to
breathe properly.
She then said she was having a pain in the back of
her neck area and she
asked Shanta to hold her hands real tight and to
also press the back of her neck.
Rudrani then asked Shanta "are you ready to take
off?" Shanta said "yes I am ready".
Rudrani then asked`` Shanta has Tulasi Maharani
arrived?"
Shanta said "yes, She is right there ", and
pointed to the picture of Tulasi
Maharani in her Gopi form taped to the TV screen
above her bed. The picture
was the front cover of a card (10x17) made by
Manoharini dasi with devotees well wishes inside.
Rudrani said"That is the painting, I mean has the
real Tulasi Maharani arrived here?"
Shanta said"Yes,She has arrived She is right here
with you"
Rudrani then said "OK then let's chant"
While firmly and loudly chanting Shanta started
crying because Shanta felt Rudrani was going to leave soon.
So immediately Rudrani stopped chanting and told
Shanta "do not cry, just chant with me" And they continued to chant
together
After chanting several times the Hare Krsna Maha Mantra Rudrani’s
voice became feeble, breathing became labored, Rudrani’s mouth was
firmly forming the Maha Mantra silently. While silently chanting
peacefully Rudrani stopped breathing and left her body.
Epilogue
Rudrani always liked all the aspects of Krsna Consciousness as
established by Srila Prabhupada but her most favorite was
distribution of Srila Prabhupada’s books, Hari Nama Sankirtan, and
of course taking care of Srimati Tulasi Maharani. She always came
forward strongly to speak to temple authorities and devotees to keep
up the standards set by Srila Prabhupada.
Her last wish was a request to friends, family and devotees for
their continuous support for the care of Srimati Tulasi Maharani.
Your servant, Sananda Kumar Dasa
Pyari Mohan
Das (ABBSP)
While staying in
Vrndavan I would regularly call my wife Jiva to let her know I was still
ok. During one such call she let me know that Rudrani was very close to
leaving her body and me of how much Rudrani was devoted to Tulasi Devi.
She told me that I should go to Vrinda Kunda and sponsor something for
her. Even though my wife hadn't been with Rudrani for years, they were
still very close friends and my wife was very attached to her.
I personally met
Rudrani only a few times and she was always very pleasant, and amazingly
cheerful inspite of her debilitating disease. I also knew from my wife
that she was a very special person, so right after the phone call to my
wife, I went to a taxi stand and booked a taxi for the next morning to
go to Vrinda Kund.
The next morning I
waited alone for the taxi, I found doing things alone in Vrindavan more
spiritual, maybe it was just that I became more sentimental. In either
case, this last journey to Vrindavan I spent most of my time alone
rather than hanging out the other devotees. Of course I went to the
Krishna Balarama mandir every day and there were always hundreds of
devotees all around, but at the same time, I felt alone with Krishna.
The tasi was one hour
late, so he took 50 rupess off the price. When I arrived at Vrinda Kund,
Dinabandhu and about 70 Chinese devotees were there. I first offered
some prayers for Rudrani.
I spoke with
Dinabandhu about sponsoring something for Rudrani because she was a
great devotee of Tulasi devi. He gave me different options and I settled
for a feast in her name for 2,501 Rupees. The feast was to be for school
children.
I circumambulated
Vrinda devi and then circumambulated around Vrinda devi and her kund
three times. After that I went in front of her and offered my heartfelt
prayers asking her to please go and take Rudrani back to meet Radha &
Krishna. I explained how she was a great devotee of hers and was about
to leave her body. I was crying as I was asking Srimati Vrinda devi to
please come and take Rudrani and help her to Radha & Krishna.
When I went back to
Loi Bazaar later that day, I saw a bus with large letters across the
side which read RUDRANI. I took that as a good sign.
I didn't tell anyone,
even my wife, about my prayers to Vrinda devi until after my wife told
me about Rudrani's auspicious passing. When I called my wife and found
out that Vrinda devi did come to take Rudrani back to meet Radha &
Krishna, I cried again.
I believe Rudrani was
going back to Godhead even if I didn't do anything, but at the same
time, knowing that my prayers were answered, and that Vrinda devi did
come to take Rudrani, it has certainly made my faith in Srila Prabhupada,
Vrinda devi and Krishna much stronger.
My prayers were simple
for Vrinda devi to come and take Rudrani back to meet Radha & Krishna. I
did not ask for any verification that the job was done, but being so
merciful, not only did she fulfill my prayer, but also let me know that
she did it. Spiritual life is so amazing, Vrinda devi answered my
prayers and gave me conformation that she did in fact answer them.
Vrindavan is a very
special place, and even if we are not able to see it, we can certainly
feel it.
Srimati Vrinda devi ki
jaya!
Rudrani devi dasi ki
jaya!
Srila Prabhupada ki
jaya!
Pyari Mohan Das
Jivanausadhi DD
(ACBSP)
(edited from several emails sent Nov 4)
My husband said that he is
going to Vrinda Kund and going to do something (like some special puja)
there for Rudrani. We will be having special bhajans for her here too.
I am thinking of her all the time. I have been offering candles to Lord
Damodar for her everyday. I hope she feels that we are with her in
spirit.
Today my husband sponsored a feast at
Vrinda Kund for Rudrani
Gokulananda Dasa
(ACBSP)
A humble
saint's glorious departure
New Gokula
Community, Vancouver, B.C., Canada -
Our beloved
God-sister Rudrani Mataji ACBSP has recently departed us in a most
glorious manner.
Although we are sad
to be now bereft of her uplifting association, we all remain in awe
before her exemplary life's total absorption in Krishna consciousness,
in spite of a severely defective body ravaged for decades with chronic
rheumatoid arthritis. We were always amazed by her cheerful and
enthusiastic demeanor, as she somehow transcended her bodily affliction,
tolerating untold suffering with silent strength. Back in 1976, when
Srila Prabhupada was informed of her serious disease (provoked by a
near-fatal car accident while traveling to distribute his books), he
instructed Rudrani to tolerate her diseased condition while pursuing her
devotional life despite all inconvenience. She sincerely took his
instruction to heart and became totally absorbed in Krishna
consciousness. With utmost humility and purity of heart, she maintained
a very deep level of sadhana and service attitude. She was specially
attracted to Tulsi seva; teaming up with her husband Sananda Das (Dr.Sukumaran,
a professional Ayur Vedic therapist), they brought our temple's Tulsi
seva dept. to an unprecedented level of pure devotion. Their glorious
service also brought many other local devotees on-board to further
expand Tulsi's care. Their glorious team service was also featured in a
recent B.T.G. article (in the 2006 March-April issue). So like father
like daughter: long recognized as our most advanced devotee, she
exemplified the pure-hearted servant of her perfect guru, who has
abundantly blessed his loving daughter with great advancement and
purity.
So glorious
in her devotional life, she was also most glorious in her departure.
During her last two months among us, as her ailing body finally broke
down, her spirit shone brighter and brighter. Showing utter indifference
to her bodily breakdown, she kept gracefully encouraging all of us with
her indomitable serenity and humour. In her final moments, she turned to
her life-long care-giver, her sister-in-law Shanta Mataji (who was
holding a large picture of Vrinda Devi in front of her), and she told
her with loving eyes:
"Yes I'm actually
seeing Vrinda Maharani Herself...I have to go now". Then they chanted
the Maha-mantra together for a few moments until her final breath.
Such was this
beautiful soul's glorious departure for the Lord's eternal service.
Thank you
Rudrani Mataji for your glorious life's perfection to strengthen our
conviction that Lord Krishna always kindly takes care of His own.
Although we will miss your saintly association, you have left us all the
ladder of your shining example of unconditional service to Guru and
Krishna, to help us along on our own journeys back to Home. And we will
remain eternally indebted to you for all these blessings that you
selflessly gave us, our saintly hero Rudrani Devi Dasi.
Your grateful
servant, Gokulananda Dasa, ISKCON Vancouver.
Racitambara DD,
(ACBSP)
Jayadradika dd, Toshan das
& Revati dd
(Mayapur)
Revati Sundari dd immediately
began to cry. Her first words were: "Oh, everyone will miss Mother
Rudrani. Now there will be an empty space in the world."
Jayada Radhika dd: I'm so happy that she's finally been released from
her debilitated body and that now she's able to serve Krsna to her full
capacity.
Tosan-nitai dasa: Rudrani Mataji was such a nice devotee. Even though
she was so sick, she always had lots of candy for the children on
Halloween.
(Having been raised in India, Tosan never experienced Halloween until he
came to Canada. Rudrani gave him his first-ever Halloween candy.)
Racitambara dasi: I feel blessed again and again to have had Rudrani
Mataji's association during the time we spent in Vancouver. If we can
take her example of tolerance and dedication, we can follow in her
footsteps and all be together again one day in the spiritual world. It
is with great sorrow that I think of losing her association, and it is
with great joy that I think of Rudrani now back Home with her beloved
Lord Krishna and with Srimati Vrinda Devi.
When Revati said that now there would be an empty place in the world, I
countered with, "Now that empty place back at Godhead has just filled
up!"
Much love to you, Rudrani. We will miss you, but we're grateful that you
are showing us the way to go Home.
ADD ON I'm so very sorry for everyone who
will miss her, and so very happy for Rudrani that she has achieved
release from this body and will certainly be back Home with Krishna.
This is the culmination of all the teachings of Srila Prabhupada, and
she has followed his instructions and achieved the goal.
You will miss her very much and I wish I was there to help you through
this difficult time.
your humble servant,
Racitambara Dasi
Uttama Devi Dasi
(ACBSP)
I am sorry that I
can not come to be with you all after Rudrani’s passing, but perhaps
that is best, for as you know, I am usually too emotional to say what I
deeply feel, so it is good to write.
I have to say that
true to my nature, I burst into tears on hearing of Rudrani's passing.
It is said that service in separation is the highest. I don’t really
know much about spiritual emotions, but I have to say that just
remembering Rudrani’s wonderful nature somehow makes me feel elevated,
protected and loved, and grateful to be engaging in devotional service.
Surly I will miss her, but somehow, remembering her kind and giving
nature is such an inspiration. Even though debilitated to various
degrees the last half of her life; she gave more to me than I ever gave
her. She always remembered to touch our lives at each transition-
birthdays, moving, kids getting married - whatever transition we were
experiencing she always went out of her way to offer her blessings and
gifts. She was ready to help in whatever way she could, and she always
managed to help a lot- its amazing what one can accomplish when one has
the heart to- walking and getting about pain free are simply external,
mundane ways to accomplish results.
My mother once heard
me mention Rudrani and her struggle with arthritis and gave me a lamb’s
wool mattress pad to give to Rudrani. Rudhrani sent her a thank-you note
and they became life-long correspondents, exchanging Christmas cards and
sometimes phone calls if Rudrani could not write. I don’t know if they
ever met in person, but my mother considers her a dear friend.
Rudrani will always
be an inspiration to me- how bhakti is truly ahaituki-apratihata -
unimpeded by any bodily or material consideration. Rudrani’s care of
Srimati Tulasi Devi is testimony to that- I doubt the demigods could
take care of Her better. I’m sure the Tulasi plants that Rudrani cared
for and inspired others to care for, rival any in the heavenly planets.
We all have our
dream of how we will leave our bodies, and again we are witness to the
fact that external circumstances don’t really matter. Krsna arranges
everything. If we have served Srila Prabhupada to our utmost capacity,
Krsna will see that. I know that I serve with reservations- much of my
capacity is in reserve for me-just in case. But, remembering Rudrani’s
selfless service inspires me to serve selflessly, and I pray this is not
simply, ‘grave-yard piety’, as Srila Prabhupada would coin. I pray that
her inspiration may continue to prod me to be a better servant of Srila
Prabhupada, the Vaisnavas and Lord Sri Krsna.
When one of my
god-sisters described Rudrani’s passing, her impulse to chant with her
close devotee friend, Shanta, and how focused she was on Tulasi Devi, I
immediately thought of how merciful Srila Prabhupada is to engage us in
services which bring such transcendental results. I hope that
remembering Rudrani will impel us all to be better servants of each
other, Srila Prabhupada, Lord Sri Krsna and all his associates. Srimati
Vrnda-devi ki-jaya! Srimati Rudrani Devi ki-jaya!
Uttama devi dasi
Susheel Gopalan
Dear
Rudrani Prabhu,
Please accept my humble obeisances. All glories to our beloved Srila
Prabhupada. All glories to your life and your auspicious departure.
First
of all I want to apologize for not visiting you in the last few weeks.
It was a conscious decision on my part subsequent to the extended visit
soon after the first attack. After seeing how you felt compelled to
extend your warm affection and hospitality even when your body was
crumbling, I couldn’t bear to put you through it. Besides, I also
realized that it was best if your mind was undisturbed with associations
of this world during the final preparation for the journey beyond.
Nevertheless, as per your instructions, Shanta and Sananda kept me well
informed.
Looking back at the last ten years, I feel very blessed to have enjoyed
the close friendship that we shared. It was a relationship of great
significance to me. The fact that you were a worthy ambassador for all
the causes you represented and you were exemplary in every role you
played, be that of a woman, wife, sister, friend or a devotee of the
Lord, certainly made you unique. Your honesty and integrity were
unquestionable. Your witty sense of humor made even the most unpleasant
circumstances very lively and fun. You were blessed with an amazing
intellect that allowed you to execute your plans with perfection. You
had the most beautiful mind that I have known and it served you so well
till your last breath. But all that would not explain why I had come to
truly love and admire you. What made you so special was that you
genuinely believed in the welfare of others, including those you had
never known, more than you believed in the welfare of yourself. Of this
there was not an iota of doubt and you proved it till your last breath.
This is a quality that I have read about in scriptures, but never
witnessed in this life, until I came across you.
Over
the years we talked about many subjects, but none more elaborately than
spiritual philosophies. In my presentation on Vedic philosophy in
November of 2003, I acknowledge this with “Dedicated to Rudrani Devi
Dasi for exemplifying the virtues of a lady, for her inexplicable
strength and courage, for her constant support and encouragement, for
her motherly attention, and most of all, for inspiring love for the
Creator in all who cross her path”. True to your nature however, you
refused to take credit and requested that I dedicate it to Bhakti-Tirtha
Swami instead. Your zeal for promoting spiritual knowledge remained
paramount to the very end. A brief recap of spiritual philosophies seems
only fitting on this occasion.
The
quest for spiritual knowledge starts with the urge to find out where we
come from, what our purpose here is and where we go from here. The
common philosophies can be grouped into the philosophy of matter, the
philosophy of rules and regulations, the philosophy of an impersonal God
and the philosophy of a personal God. I recall the conversations where
we both concluded that irrespective of the philosophy we subscribe to,
what was required for continual progress was sincerity in the quest.
Spiritual conclusions can be grouped into three levels of understanding.
The first level of understanding involves the eternity of the soul. The
second level recognizes the laws of nature. The third and highest level
recognizes the need to dedicate all actions in the service of the Lord
so that we are no longer encumbered by the reactions to our actions.
The
philosophy of matter limits its search to the analysis of corporeal
substances and comes up with conclusions like the Big Bang and Darwin’s
theory of evolution. It does not acknowledge the existence and eternity
of the soul. Nevertheless, it serves the purpose of starting the process
of inquiry.
The
philosophy of rules and regulations inherently recognizes the first and
second levels of spiritual understanding, but denies the need to
dedicate actions to the service of the Lord. Curiously we know that the
Lord Himself promotes this philosophy for certain states of
consciousness as in the case with the Buddha incarnation.
The
philosophy of an impersonal God recognizes the Lord as an all pervading
energy. It defines liberation as merging into oneness with this energy.
When Arjuna asks Lord Krishna about the merits of this philosophy, the
Lord discourages Arjuna by indicating that while both the personal and
impersonal philosophies ultimately reach the highest destination, it is
by far more difficult to comprehend the impersonal path for an embodied
soul. This response is easy to reconcile with our own observations.
Finally we have the philosophy of a personal God. All the major
religions of the world derived from philosophies such as the Vedic
philosophy, the philosophy of Christ and that of Mohammed conform to
this category where service and love for the Lord and all His creations
is the recommended path. Indeed Rudrani, you exemplified this path.
Rudrani, I thank you for taking the time to sit with me and talk about
these subjects. I know on most occasions you did this in spite of all
the physical pain you endured.
I
gather from Shanta, that your “take-off” went according to your desire
all along. You got the go-ahead from the control tower without delay
once you got to the final runway and you achieved full throttle and the
desired altitude <smile>.
Rudrani, I have one final request to make. I want you to use that
beautiful consciousness of yours to carve what is best for the two
individuals that mean so much to both of us. I know we talked about them
many times and how indebted you felt for their unconditional love and
dedication to their duty. From your current vantage you must determine
the best path forward and guide them accordingly. Knowing you, I know
you will do that and a lot more.
My
dear Rudrani, on that note I will end for now. Talk soon or leave me a
number where I can reach you! <smile>
With
lots of love, hugs and gratitude for your friendship. You know you are
dearly missed.
Susheel.
Bhaktidevi Dasi
My dear Friend Rudraniji,
PAMHO, AGTSP.
It is always easy to say Hi to a friend and
exchange greetings when people meet, but when it comes to say the
last hello to a friend like you it is not easy at all, because
memories of life comes in the mind and mixed feelings of happiness
and distress overwhelming the the heart do to separation.
Ernest Heminway's writings come to my mind , “
for whom the Bell Tolls.” El’ Sordo’s last stand comes to my mind
unwillingness to believe in blind faith… speaks also about Loyalty
and Courage, Loyalty to your, our Spiritual master A.C Bhaktivedanta
srila Prabhupada Those two qualities ARE the true emblem of a
preacher, a fighter to your calibre, and you our dear Rudrani have
exhibited all these vaisnava qualities on His name. Nothing
personal. Always ready to spread kindness loving and caring words
and be truthful , sweet and compassionate with a dose of humour and
honesty .
In your quite place town living along with the
family members , you were able to monitor the devotional thermometer
of our temple, by rendering unconditional devotional service to the
“Queen of Vraja” “ Srimati Tulsi maharani”, who served you also
faithfully untill the last moment of yur life.
I am happy today because the Lord grand you a
Royal place in His Kingdom , an eternal safe palace to live with all
his associates , gopis and gopas. He freed you from all the miseries
of this material coverings , the material body and all the
calamities. But I am a little sad today because I will miss your
association , your loving and encouraging words, the privacy and
protection , the loving aura that you were creating around every
body who was coming to meet you!!.
I will always remember , telling to Dr Sananda,
your husband in a tender wifely manor, “ You always tell me to relax
“ , “leave me alone”. ready to give instructions do to the supreme
duty that the disciple have towards the spiritual master to help
others. In my eyes you are a true Sankirtanero.
Mother P with her sisterly affection will
always remember and be surprised how well you exhibited the last
moments of your life, in this material world. She is so proud of you
along with other members of the family.
Sananda prabhu your life’s companionship, your
eternal servant the glorious Shantii the closest shaki, other family
members brothers, sisters , temple devotees , krsna’s friends, we
all offer you our most dear respectful obeisance’s, to you Lotus
feet.
Your insignificant servant and friend
Bhakti devi dasi ( Elizabeth Barreca)
P. S Rudrani ,you always will be my life’s
star, Idol saintly personality, please pray for me and my soul also
for my family from were you are as we always leave together
eternally, my dear senior God-sister. May Lord Krsna keeps you close
and tide in His abode.
Tridadni BhikSu, Bhakti Visrambha Madhava
All glories to Rudrani devi dasi's
service to Tulasidevi! Vrndadevi is so kind to her servant, Pundarik
tulasi stotrum verse 2 says, "namah Moksaprade devi and "namaha
sampatpradayike, and elsewhere in the same stotrum, "sarvasampatpradayike"
that " she can give liberation, and everything else to her assistant".
Rudrani devi's wonderful statements at Her departure time will certainly
be a lasting testimonial to the fact how Tulasi devi can indeed give
everything to Her sincere servant, these last statements of Rudrani will
give historical inspiration to all of the servants of Srimati Tulasi
devi all over the world!
Jaya Rudrani devi dasi's tulasi seva!
Rudrani's dedication to Tulasi rani will all be sorely missed by the
rest of us unfortunates, who will miss her dedication to Tulasi devi and
who are now unfortunately bereft of Rudrani's advice and council on
Tulasi seva..
after reading the wonderful BTG article, I personally, was really
looking forward to visiting Vancouver to get Rudrani's enthusiastic
imputs for a future possible expanded tulasi seva book.
I've even went so far as to get concrete plans for flight numbers etc
how to come on a RTW ticket to vancouver. but due to urgent Krsna
Balarama book work now going on, I'll have to postpone my RTW plans for
at least 2 more years.
Now I'll have to get these imputs from her glorious husband, Krsna
willing within a few years from now. I am still planning to visit
Vancouver to see the Tulasi seva there and get imputs for such a book.
the departure of any great vaisnava's or vaisnavi of substance,,,
reminds me of a statement reportedly made by HH TKG once in this
regard," before the departure of a great soul we are requested to pray
to Krsna for their benefit, but after they depart in a nice way, it's
time for us to request them to pray for us now, let's pray *to them*
instead of for them.
we all.. who have to rot here waiting our turn- Yet Rudrani's departure
taking shelter of Vrndadevi really does boost our strength and
determination to Love Tulasi more and more! May Vrndadevi bless the
world with her shelter like she gave Rudrani devi dasi!
Tridandi BhikSu, Bhakti Visrambha Madhava
Rudrani's
Horoscope at Passing
Visnu Dasa (ACBSP)
Rudrani devi dasi
passed away when the Moon was conjunct 27 degrees in
Gemini in the 7th Nakhatra of
Punarvasu, a deva or godly star. It is translated as the
"luminous", the "brilliant" and the "sattvic" one. Lord Shri Rama
was born during the transit of this Nakshatra !
The word Punarvasu , also called "Jaya", is
derived from Puna + Vasu, which means "return, renewal, or the
return of energy". It is a nurturing star and of a maternal nature.
For one to pass away at this time
brings excellent spiritual benefits. Although if one is a sincere
devotee of Hari, one is already
transcendentally blessed and thus transcends the external influences
of the stars
and planets. Never-the-less, in a
devotee's case, it is of interest to note how the planets were
aligned and
especially how Sri Krishna arranges
cosmological events for HIs devotee's benefit also.
This auspicious star reflects the
Vaisnava-like qualities of humility and self-control, intelligence,
purification of
the self, giving in charity, and the
ability to persevere and undergo changes easily. These specific
qualities
we have seen in Rudrani's own
character.
Punarvasu is the nakshatra ruled by
the goddess Aditi, the mother of the demigods.
At the time of Her Grace Rudrani
dasi's passing, the sky directly above her was under the influence
of Aditi's
star Punarvasu , and as Aditi is the
mother of the demigods, all the demigods also attend to their mother
as she
travels through the heavens. So all
the devas are present when Punarvasu transits overhead.
There is no word "coincidence" in Vaishnava vocabulary.
So for one to leave this earth-plane
during the presence of such a benefic Nakshatra and which is so
honored by all the demigods, it is surely an auspicious time for the
great transformation and the transmigration of the soul.
Jai Srimati Rudrani devi dasi, you are
blessed and may you go in peace back to Godhead, back to Sri
Krishna!
your servant Vishnudas
Dr. Sukumar
friend of
Rudrani & Sananda
Rudrani Devi was a special friend of mine.
Whenever we met, she always made me feel like I am her favorite
person and with her care, love and friendship, I have grown
spiritually and we had a very special relationship.
She was one of
the most beautiful – beautiful inside and outside- persons I came
across in life.
I was talking to
some others about her and they also said they had a special
relationship with her! How dare! In short she made all of us feel
special and helped us connect with the spiritual inner being.
My wife Bindu
and our children also were close to Rudrani and her loss is a loss
of a family member to us. More than us, she used to celebrate our
birthdays and anniversaries. She gave us our first Christmas gifts
and taught us to sing WE WISH YOU A HARE KRISHNA ….
Bindu and I had
the good fortune of meeting and getting to know Dr. Sukumaran,
Sister Santha and Rudrani for the last 18 years. Whenever we got
together, I wondered who is the doctor here, Sukumaran or Rudrani?
She gave me a special massage chair to sit and fed me goodies every
time I visited them. She asked me about my work and and listened to
me intently. She wanted to know everything! I think my wife was a
bit jealous that I was getting all her attention! I should confess
now, that whenever I went there, I used to sneak in a chocolate bar
for her and we both agreed that Krishna wouldn’t oppose to that as
He Himself is fond of sweet! Adharam madhuarm vadanam madhuram
madhuraadhipathe rakhilam madhuram!
In good summer
days we used to go out for picnics and after eating we used to lie
down under a tree and Rudrani used to read us inspirational stories!
Imagine four grown ups lying down under a tree and Rudrani reading
us stories!
I think the
sense of humour runs in her family. Once she claimed to me that she
is ready to practice as a surgeon and looking for some volunteers as
patients. I asked how? She said she has seen a lot of surgery
on the learning channel and almost all those surgeries have been
performed on her as well! So she had the knowledge and experience!
What else do you need? Let us go for it!
I am from
Kerala. She lived there for about 8 years with Dr. Sukumaran and
Santhedatthy. She had a special love for Kerala and everything that
is related to Kerala. She never failed to attend all the Kerala
association programs in BC and she even sat through many of the
great as well as not so great Malayalam movies. We used to
celebrate Onam and other Kerala festivals and she loved Kerala style
cooking.
With me she
always wanted to show off her language skills – she would open the
door when we visit her, saying – swaagatham… namaskaaram… She
learned a bit of Malayalam from a teacher in Kerala and I was her
sounding board here in Vancouver. She loved to sing a few wonderful
Malayalam songs on her favourite Krishna and whenever I wrote a poem
or something on spirituality or about Sri Krishna, she used to get
excited and she used to encourage me. She had the patience to hear
me sing too.
One of her
favorite Malayalam song about Krishna is as follows. The song is
about the devotee longing for his Lord’s auspicious darsan. He is so
particular that the lord should appear before him as bala gopala, in
his favorite yellow silk dhoti, adorning the bells and jewels,
playing his flute and amongst the gopis and cows.
kani kaanum
neram kamalanethrande
niramerrum manjathugil chaarthi
kanaka kingini vallagal mothiram
aninju kanenam bhagavane
Rudrani had a
wonderful life and that’s what she showed me. Her pain and suffering
was never a topic of our conversations. Good to have known you
Rudrani, I know, you are in good hands!
Harilila Devi Dasi
(ACBSP)
Dear Rudrani prabhu,
I see your gracious smiling face, feel
your compassion and get inspired by your devotion, all within the first
few minutes of meeting you. I never quite understood how a person could
be so caring, warm and focused on the welfare of others. I knew at those
times and even more now that it is because you are such an exemplary
devotee.
Sometimes if we are fortunate we can learn
from others how to be better people ourselves, how to be more gracious,
how to deal with illness. I remember that your body did hurt, that it
did cause a lot of trouble, but you would never know it from your
consciousness.
I don't know how to express how much you
affected me by your exemplary behaviour except to say that I have tried
to be more loving, more compassionate, more thoughtful of others, and
more devotional because of you. Perhaps someday I will even be inspired
to love Tulasi devi more.
Thank you for your wonderful association
and that of Sananda and Shanta.
We will all miss you.
Your servant Harilila dd
Madan
Mohan Mohini DD (ACBSP)
sent Nov 4th
I have just received
word about my dear godsister, Rudrani prabhu, and it is with great
saddness that I write this letter.
I don't know when you shall get this, but if Rudrani is still with us
and if it is possible, please convey this message to her from me:
Rudrani prabhu, I place my head at your feet for having followed Srila
Prabhupada's instructions all these years by setting such a wonderful
example of tolerance. I have always admired how you have been so Krsna
conscious despite so many obstacles; you have been a great teacher to
me. And so I pray that Srimati Tulasidevi now take you back to your Lord
Krsna where you so much deserve to go. Your friend and servant,
MadanMohanMohini dasi
Thank you Padyavali prabhu. I pray that you feel Lord Krsna's blessings
through these difficult times. Please offer my greatest respects to
Sunanda prabhu. Hare Krsna.
Your servant,
MadanMohanMohini dasi
Rukmanish Dasa
(ACBSP)
It is a mixture of sadness,
relief and happiness when one hears of the death of a Vaishnava.
Sadness for the loss of the association, relief that the suffering is
over and happiness for the soul's final migration.
Rudrani represented strength, compassion, love and many many other fine
qualities.
While I have not talked to Rudrani for some years, She always had some
good advice for me if I asked for it back in the old days.
Rudrani will be missed for sure. A devotee of this caliber is a very
honorable person.
For those of us left, the battle still goes on, but for me, I know that
in that Spiritual place known as Goloka Vrndaban, is a devotee, I knew
as Rudrani Devi Dasi.
Love conquers all.
Rukminisa dasa
Padmpani Dasa (ACBSP)
Dear Mother Rudrani Devi Dasi,
Please accept my humble obeisances. All glories to Srila Prabhupada.
It's my great misfortune that I never had the chance to meet with you
personally. But I remember your name so clearly back in the early 70's
when our traveling party from Vancouver went through Toronto and your
name was already famous because of your phenomenal service to Sri Sri
Radha Gopinatha, the presiding Deities there. Your sincerity and
dedication was well known to one and all, and you automatically had the
respect of everyone.
Although your devotion was certainly famous in Canada and North America,
there's one thing that you might not be aware of, but which held great
significance to those of us who went to serve in the Middle East in the
late 70's and early 80's. Somehow or other, we carred along with us a
copy of "The Teachings of Queen Kunti," which provided us with much
spiritual solace during those war-torn years -- and which, lo and behold
-- contained a handwritten inscription on the inside cover of
Prabhupada's book which read: "In the care of Rudrani Devi Dasi."
That
book -- and your inscription -- kept us hopeful during the darkest days
of war.
To this day, I wonder how we managed to obtain that book -- but I thank
you most sincerely without reservation for offering us the best
protection available during those great challenges which we had to face
during those most troubling years of seva to Srila Prabhupada. Just for
that alone, your entrance to the Spiritual Sky is guaranteed, without a
doubt.
And we
are always grateful to you for reminding us of Queen Kunti' surrender in
the most seemingly hopeless and dangerous curcumstances available in
this miserable material world.
Many thanks from us all for setting such a fine example of a pure and
faithful Vaisnavi in Srila Prabhupada's service. We're all indebted to
you, without a doubt.
"He reasons ill who tells that Vaisnavas die When thou art living still
in sound!
The Vaisnavas die to live, and living try To spread the holy name
around!"
--Srila Bhaktivinoda Thakura
All glories to your service and your wonderful example to us all.
With much gratitude.
Your aspiring servant,
Padmapani Dasa
(Bio)
General Announcement..
Jaya Govinda Dasa
It is with regret that I inform you
of the passing of Her Grace Rudrani Devi Dasi (ACBSP) who gave up her
body this morning
November 10th 2:45 AM PST
Rudrani Prabhu was the sister of Padyavali
Prabhu (ACBSP) and beloved wife of Sananda Prabhu (JPS)
Rudrani left her body at an auspicious
time chanting the holy names of the Lord holding the hand of Santa, her
sister in law, while looking at her beloved Tusli Maharani.
Best known for her dedicated service to
Srimati Tulsi Devi, Rudrani along with her husband & sister in law
oversaw the care of the Vancouver Temple Tulsi plants which were
featured in the March/April 2006 issue of BTG.
Although throughout most of her devotional
life she was plagued with a debilitated body, she was always tolerant
and dedicated to serving her spiritual master His Divine Grace AC
Bhaktivedanta Swami Srila Prabhupada.
Such a wonderful Vaisnavi as Rudrani will
certainly be missed by all who had the good fortune of her association
but beyond a shadow of a doubt her destination is certainly most
auspicious having dedicated and displayed vaisnava qualities throughout
her life.
Your aspiring servant in Lord Krishna’s
Service,
Jaya Govinda Das
Ajamila Dasa
(ACBSP)
I never personally met Rudrani
d.d. but I know her sister Padyavali well.
But simply by 'hearing' about Rudrani's most auspicious departure
from this mortal world was enough, something every Vaisnava dreams
about. The last moment of one's life is so crucial, as Lord Krishna
states in the Bhagavad-gita. But for pure devotees Krishna
personally arranges their death so that they can nicely remember
Him, as was the case with Rudrani who consciously remembered Lord
Krishna's devotee, Vrinda Devi, at her very last moment.
To even be CONSCIOUS at the last moment is in itself a huge
blessing. When death is combined with much distracting pain and/or
unconsciousness it indicates more negative karma needs to be
undergone. But when a pure devotee like Rudrani departs consciously
thinking of Krishna it indicates there is no more karma to burn up
and so she attained liberation to Krishna's eternal
associates....more
In Jyotish many things are said about death, one such thing is that
to leave the body unconsciously is inauspicious whereas to leave
while being conscious is auspicious. The latter combined with
remembering Krishna or one of His eternal associates like Vrinda
devi is guaranteed liberation to the spiritual realm to be with that
eternal associate. Rudrani d.d. showed us all how to do it. Just
hearing about the way Rudrani consciously said just before her
departure "I see the real Tulasi. I have to go now!" was amazing and
purifying in itself. It was a perfect departure and a nice example
for us all.
All glories to Rudrani d.d.
Ys Ajamila Dasa
Rudrani
Devi Dasi #2 ACBSP
The literal
meaning of Rudrani , as stated in Krsna Book, means "one who
makes one cry to remember Krishna"....and I did cry when I
heard she passed away.
Rudrani and I were both initiated
by Srila Prabupada.
My first fond memories of her was
back in 1977 on sankirtan in Berkely California and then in
Mayapura. I later learned about her car accident when she was on
sankirtan, and how her arthritis plagued her as it slowed down
her active preaching life. She deeply took shelter of the books
and chanting.
Throughout the last 30 years in my
travels to India and other temples, festivals etc...our
god-sisters would ask about Rudrani. They would often confuse us
because we had the same name! This also happened to her and we
would laugh about it together.
The devotees asked about her
health and how she was doing. They would say please offer my
obeisance's to her when you see her, or they would say they
would pray to Krishna for her. These devotees never even met her
but heard about her.
I remember back in 1980 in
Waterloo Ontario at our preaching center Rudrani stayed for
about a week to preach to guests and help prepare prasad. We
were waiting for the arrival of my deities Radha Shyamasundara
from India.
Rudrani was an exemplary devotee.
Whatever health issues she was dealing with she never
complained... when I would ask her how she was feeling she
briefly talked about her pain and then changed the subject to Srila
Prabhupada. As her condition worsened over the years I was so
happy the day she told me over the phone that she was married
to Sananda, an ayurvedic doctor from India. I was praying that
he could help her arthritis in some way.
Rudrani had miraculous inner
strength and faith in Srilla Prabhupada and his instructions.
Rudrani was naturally straight
forward, kind, simple and a very genuine person. I admired her
purity and sincerity and her great sense of humour. She had a
very special way of making you feel at ease in her presence,
because she was at peace with herself...
She taught us that we can serve
Krishna under any circumstance. She lived her devotional life
that way, right to the very end. Rudrani will continue to
inspire me always and I hope to follow in her footsteps.
Rudrani Devi Dasi #2
Sudevi sundari Dasi
On one hand I'm
feeling happy about our dear Rudrani leaving her body
since she is no longer experiencing the intense pain and
suffering of this material world. On the other hand, I
am sad to lose such a wonderful, caring friend and
mentor.
I met Rudrani mataji in
2003 when I asked if I could help out in the Tulasi
house. Rudrani taught me how to pick Tulasi manjaris
and engaged me in Tulasis sweet service. She said we're
like bumblebees, the nectar collectors. I so much
enjoyed serving along side her and was always charmed by
her sense of humour.
I especially enjoyed her
nectarian association on Sundays when the "Tulasi crew"
would bring Tulasi Maharani outside, all 100 of Them,
and we would all work together. During our break we'd
have a picnic, they made the best popcorn on the planet.
Her purity and upbeat
personality almost completely overshadowed the fact
that she had an extremely painful and debilitating
disease. She is a huge inspiration and I draw strength
from her incredible ability to tolerate her condition by
following the orders of her Spiritual Master.
Thank you Rudrani, I love
you and miss you.
Your servant, Sudevi
sundari dasi
Pavani Devi
Dasi (ACBSP)
Sent Nov 6
If Rudrani is on life
support, as Jivanausadhi told me, then her situation is very
precarious and she may soon leave her body. I think how fortunate we
are that we have such a full philosophy that prepares us for this
inevitable situation.
Several months ago, my yoga teacher passed away. One day she was the
epitomy of health and beauty and fitness and within six months she
was just a little ball of bones with no muscular control. She,
although she was a vegetarian, was diagnosed with Jacobs....disease.
It is basically another name for mad cow discease. What was
unfortunate about her death is that she knew she was dying, but her
family tried to deny it to themselves and never acknowledged it to
her.
As a result she had to, for the most part, face death all alone. As
a result of her ordeal, I had many realizations about death. Here
are some of them.
We spend our entire life, as devotees, preparing our selves this
final circumstance.
Death is, like birth, something we wish to joyfully share with our
closest friends and family.
Death is, again, like birth in that rather than giving birth to a
baby, we birth ourselves into our next transmigration. Just as the
birthing airs of the mother push the baby out of her body, birthing
airs push the soul out of the body. Just as when birthing a child we
have a coach, when leaving our body we must have a coach or coaches.
Coaches are our closest friends and family who will help us focus
and cheer us on in a selfless way as we prepare for and embark on
this great birthing of all births. When such time is near, we can
look forward to it with great excitement!
The great illusion about death--is that it it really is birth!
This understanding has really made me able to face this upcoming
event in my life in a more positive light.
Do you have any more information on Rudrani at this time. I'm hoping
you say, it was all just a big scare and she's fine now. That way
Rudrani and I could perhaps start e-mail each other!
Yesterday, we had a wonderful festival here on Watseka. Tulsie and
Shalagram were married. It was a beautiful day. I was honored to be
able to bake a big beautiful (simple) cake for
Rudrani....woops....for Tulsi & Shalagram and then to later go on
the altar to help dress Jaganattha/Balarama & Rud...there I go
again, & Subadra in a new night outfit. That was after chanting 32
rounds.
I
was thinking about Rudrani throughout the day and wondering how to
respond to Jivanausadhi's phone call.
My greatest regret is that I have so much neglected to communicate
with such an elevated vishnavi. Gosh. I thought I was on the right
tract, thinking that I have covered all my avenues in the sense that
I try to applogize for offenses and not hold grudges even for a few
hours just in case that person or I should leave our bodies. Now
this! I feel as if I was hit by a truck and there's nothing to do
but send her prayerful support in whichever direction her life
goes....!
Padyavali, can you tell Rudrani the following story? While passing
through Seattle airport, I looked up at the ramp - walkway that
curves around the second floor of the airport and there was the
policeman that was your contact when we were working the airport
there. Remember? You said to him, "You take care of then, and I'll
take care of the women and I'l take care of the men."
He was nice looking with big eyes and fair, wavy hair. I quickly
went up the elevator and introduced myself to him and he was
overjoyed at meeting me.
He
was just so happy! Would you believe he began asking me about each
one of the girls starting with Joni. He wanted to know about all of
us and what we were doing now. I was amazed! He was so interested! I
believe he is now the head of the airport police.
Rudrani, I love to remember our airport days and especially the
times you were out there. I'll never forget how one day, only two or
three people walked through our area....and one of them gave you
$100! You are so sincere!
Please keep me posted. Padyavali, please send me a copy of what you
send others.
Rudrani, I love you still as my own sister and I beg you to forgive
me for my offenses!
Hare Krishna, Pavani d.d.
A CELEBRATION OF LIFE
In honor of our
sister and Aunt Rebecca (Rudrani) From her family
(compiled
by Rudrani's sister Bernadette Peters)
The journey of
life takes many directions and as a family we were spread across the
Country and sometimes around the world but the love we shared as a
family seemed to be just next door. Rebecca was instrumental in
sewing our family ties together and for that we will be forever
grateful. The example that she has shown us has changed our lives
forever.
Rebecca was an
extraordinary human being and was placed on this earth to teach each and
every person whose life she touched a valuable lesson. A lesson of
hope, courage, caring, love, selfless giving and humour. It is our
hope that those who have had the opportunity to be touched by Rebecca
will have learned from her incredible journey and time on this earth and
continue in some way to honour her by showing others the compassion,
tolerance and love she bestowed upon us.
The courage and hope
Rebecca demonstrated throughout her entire life of living with a
disabling disease was honorable. She never complained and was not
concerned about herself but only others. Her keen sense of humour
never wavered right up to the moment she left us. Even with
tremendous pain and suffering she shone a bright light on those who
surrounded her whether it was her family, one of her wonderful,
dedicated Doctors or the nurses we call angels who took such good care
of her and loved her during her stay in the hospital. With
dignity, humour and grace she thanked each and every one of them
personally for the care and love she received.
KRSNA must have
really held Rundrani close to his heart as he allowed her, even in her
final days, to have the ability to control her departure from this world
as she wanted it … the opportunity to remain conscious and tell all of
those whom have helped her and loved her how much she appreciated it.
For those who bore witness to her last weeks on earth it was nothing
short of a miracle. All watched in amazement at her ongoing hope,
courage and love.
Rebecca told us many
times during her last days that she did not understand why she was
receiving such an outpouring of love and caring from her family, temple
devotees and from those around the world whom she has met over the
years. She said she couldn’t understand why she was so fortunate
to be at such peace and share such wonderful time with her
friends and family. But anyone who has known Rebecca or has
ever crossed her path and has been touched by her kindness and love
knows exactly why she deserved such a wonderful, peaceful passing.
We, her family, wish
to pay tribute to two other angels who live among us…her loving, caring
compassionate husband Sanada and her best friend and sister, Shanta who
took care of Rebecca for the past 23 years. Our family will never
be able to thank both of you enough for your selfless, caring devotion
you have shown to Rebecca over the years. It is with this devotion
that Rebecca was able to live such a wonderful, happy life and
experience such a peaceful departure from this earth. For that we
are eternally grateful.
Rebecca told us
during her last days that it all seemed so easy this thing called death
and that all she really wanted was for all of us to be happy in
our lives. She left us a legacy of love, courage and compassion
one seldom sees in our world. We lost a sister but gained an
Angel, who has promised to watch over us all.
LIFE MUST GO ON
Grieve for me,
for I would grieve for you.
Then brush away
the sorrow and the tears
Life is not
over, but begins anew,
With courage
you must greet the coming years.
To live forever
in the past is wrong;
Can only cause
you misery and pain.
Dwell not on
memories overlong,
With others you
must share and care again.
Reach out and
comfort those who comfort you,
Recall the
years, but only for a while.
Nurse not your
loneliness; but live again.
Forget not.
Remember with a smile.
….. a Navaho
Prayer
With love and eternal
peace,
Brothers, sisters,
sisters-in-law, brothers-in-law, nephews and nieces.
Bhakta Stefan
It was only on a few
occasions that I had the fortune of Rudrani Mataji's association, yet it
was enough for me to determine her kind wisdom and faith in Srila
Prabhupada's teachings and ultimately, Bhagavan Sri Krishna. I liked her
openness to listen and her sharingness in our conversations. I can
easily recall her telephoning me to announce harinams, maybe 'cause she
was a bringer of good news but mostly because she talked to me is such a
kind way in which I liked so much.
I am amazed at how long she has suffered for. I guess it was the Lord's
mercy (only He really knows how anyways) for her to have been in the
situation that she was in, so as to have no other real option than
to just tolerate and keep serving there Lord and His devotees.
Material life is bewildering because we are truly confused in being
here, but as soon as we get the association of saintly persons such as a
pure Vishnava, like Srila Prabhupada then this place just seems to be a
waste of time. Our spiritual knowledge that grows and develops more and
more clears away the illusion of material happiness and reveals it for
what it truly is... suffering. If we lose all our material enjoyment do
to unforeseen circumstances and we're fortunate enough to recognise the
Supreme Personality of Godhead, the original proprietor of all, then in
actuality, there is no real loss. Rudrani Mataji's blessing was that she
knew Krishna through exalted devotees and so there was really nothing
material to strive for. The goal was known, the path was laid out, she
took to the path and she has now completed her journey. I celebrate her
success.
So as for her now liberated soul, she can now be truly free.
In Loving Memory,
Aspiring bhakta Stefan
Gopal
Krishna Goswami
It is with great regret that
I read about mother Rudrani's passing away on
the 11th. I was very busy with the RathYatras in Jaipur, Chandigarh and
Panchkula this past week and I had not downloaded for 3 or 4 days. I
have
just downloaded and I am sending this message, which is a little late.
Mother Rudrani was a very dedicated disciple of Srila Prabhupada. I had
the
fortune of knowing her for over 15 years. She was always Krishna
Conscious
and desirous to keep making spiritual advancement. She was handicapped
as a
result of an accident that took place during the early years of our
joining
the Krishna Consciousness movement. Externally she was often in pain and
handicapped. This was a blessing in disguise as it kept her fully at
Krsna's
lotus feet and prevented her from falling into any maya. She and her
husband
were very dedicated in serving Tulasi Devi. The beautiful Tulasi garden
in
Vancouver is a result of her dedication to Tulasi Devi. Even the BTG in
a
recent article glorified this Tulasi garden. I have no doubt that
Rudrani
was fully protected by the Supreme Lord and the Lord knows what is best
for
each one of us. Her husband Sunanda also took care of her and her sister
Padyavali, a dedicated devotee herself, was always concerned about
Rudrani's
welfare. Rudrani was a good example of a devotee being Krishna Conscious
inspite of bodily inconveniences.
Gopal Krishna Goswami
Padyavali DD
(ACBSP)
To Rudrani, my little sister
I cannot understand the way I feel
Since you left this world of pain
My heart is satisfied your journey's end Has brought happiness and gain
I don't feel loss,I don't feel sad,
I think my feelings are I'm glad
You did it all through pain and stress
None of which I can forget
Thirty two years you suffered
But not in vain, I say
You touched so many lives
It takes my breath away.
Those whose hearts you touched exclaim
"I loved her, she was my best friend
She never once complained"
I pray that I can do the same
I tried my dear sister the only way I could To find cures, medicine and
assistance But that did not do much good You found your own cure
........ love
Your medicine was others happiness
And their progress on this path
Worshipping Tulasi devi
Is now your epitaph
You were tough, but you were kind
No one you met was left behind
You loved, you laughed and you teased
You made suffering look like a breeze
Armed with the order of Srila Prabhupada "Tolerate" he said when told of
your disease And tolerate you did,it was the medicine you needed The
order of the spiritual master you have heeded
I am in awe, my little sister
Of what you have achieved.
Your chechee (older sister)
Padyavali d.d.
Balabhadra Dasa
Hare Krishna. It is with genuine
sadness that I express my sadness to learn of Mother Rudrani's
passing away. My wife and I have had several occasions of personal
association with Mataji and her husband. Towards the end of our
residency there we had the privilege of providing some small service
on a weekly basis to them. Doctor Sananda can share that if he
wishes. My wife and I feel a particular sense of indebtedness to
this couple, and I am sure that other devotees there can say the
same thing.
I know for certain that the Vancouver
temple has suffered a great loss due to the passing of this
outstanding Vaishnavi. However, I am more than certain that Mother
Rudrani is in Krishna's personal association. The wonderful service
that she and her good husband rendered to Srimate Tulasidevi, was so
much appreciated, that Krishna saw fit to broadcast it to the whole
world of Iskcon. Indeed, she was an exceptional devotee.
I am sure that there are so many other
things that I could mention, particularly if we were still residing
in New Gokula, but I am confident that there will be so many other
devotees there to speak all the things that can be said about Mother
Rudrani. Be it suffice to say that my wife and daughter and I all
share the loss that the Vancouver devotees are feeling. Our prayers
go out in particular to her husband, who now has to continue on in
her absence.
Mother Rudrani will live in our
hearts, and we feel very blessed to have had her association. I
sincerely feel that anyone who has had any personal association with
Mother Rudrani is bound to also receive the special mercy of
Krishna, on account of her pure devotional service. Hare Krishna.
Sriman Balabhadra Dasa
Kevin Gagnier
Hare Krishna
I was
saddened to learn of Rudrani
Devi’s departure, although one cannot say it
was unexpected.
I can’t say
that I had much of her association – but what little I did have was
memorable.
The only
times our paths crossed was when I went to see
Sananda and she would come to the door, invite me in and we’d
sometimes talk for 5 or ten minutes. I always appreciated the fact that
she would take an interest in what was happening with me and what my
plans were. She never seemed to harbor feelings of resentment that those
with chronic health problems often do, having accepted her lot with
dignity and grace.
Every
community has it’s pillars - and she,
Shanta and Sanada
are three of them. Without fail for the last few years, their spirit of
generosity would transcend the boundaries of
vaishnavism and they would assume the role of
Shanta Claus, distributing gifts at
Christmas time to the devotees.
At other
temples, after learning what my temple home base was, devotees would
inevitably comment on the healthy state of our
tulasi plants and the dedication and devotion of her care giving
servants. The BTG article that highlighted the contributions of
Rudrani and company gave our temple a
measure of extra notoriety
Perhaps
Srila Prabhupada
is building another ISKCON elsewhere and is gathering front line
soldiers. Sridhara Maharaja may have been
taken to head up the fund-raising, and now Rudrani
devi has been
called upon to oversee the sankirtan
department.
We miss you
mataji. Hare Krishna
Kevin
Visnu Dasa (ACBSP)
Please accept my
humble obeisances,
All glories to Srila Prabhupada,
I was very upset to hear of your
passing away. You were one devotee who
truly exemplified courage, tolerance
and devotion throughout your too short of a life.
Whenever I talked to you, you were
always concerned about my well-being, and never spoke
about yourself unless I asked. You
always inspired me to pull through hard times, and I am
eternally indebted to you for this.
Your devotional qualities will always
be memorable to me. I always felt small in your presence,
and wished I could be as humble,
self-less and tolerant of pain as you.
These are Srila Prabhupada's traits
also which you have inherited from your loving spiritual father.
Your light is still shining for all of
us back here on this not-as-humble planet.
Everytime I see Tulasidevi now, I will
think of you and sincerely mediate on the example of
selfless devotion you set for us.
You are no doubt in the higher
spiritual relams at this time wondering why
we are crying for you. I bow down to
your feet in awe and reverence.
Akrura Dasa
Some
special souls take birth in this material world to deliver a message and
to show by example, how
to lead a Krsna Conscious life under ANY circumstance.
As Sri Chaitanya
Mahaprabhu said in the eighth verse of Sri Siksastaka :
aslisya
va
pada-ratam pinastu
mam
adarsanan marma-hatam karotu
va
yatha tatha
va
vidadhatu lampato
mat-prana-nathas tu sa
eva naparah
I know no one but
Krsna as my
Lord, and He
shall remain so even if He handles me
roughly by His embrace or makes me
brokenhearted by not being
present before me. He is completely
free to do anything and everything, for He is always my
worshipful
Lord,
unconditionally.
So, we are assembled here
today to honor and celebrate the life of one such devotee of the Lord.
Mother Rudrani appeared in
Sydney Nova Scotia in 1953 (Nov 30). At a tender age of 20 she took up
the mission of spreading the KC movement in North America under the
direction of HDG AC Bhaktivedanta Swami Srila Prabhupad.
She was put through the
ultimate test by the Supreme Will (Accident in 1974-75)
and until her last breath,
after serving the movement for over thirty years,
not only did she NOT
complain about what Krsna was putting her through,
but also kept becoming
more and more Krsna Conscious. Her faith in Krishna (The Supreme
Personality of Godhead) kept on increasing as her pains (physical) were.
She was an ultimate
fighter. Almost her whole life in Krsna Consciousness was on the
battle field and was victorious everyday.
On behalf of the ISKCON
Vancouver, the members of the Governing Body Commission (HH Gopal Krsna
& Bhaktimarg Maharaj) , the local management Board and the congregation
I bow down to her.
I THANK her for her
tireless service in the Tulasi Department
with her husband HG
Sananda Prabhu and Mother Shanta as a team.
She was responsible for
bringing the Tulasi Seva standard so high in Vancouver that on my
travels around the world in other ISKCON communities,
as soon as the devotees
found out that I was representing Vancouver,
right away they would ask
me how our Tulasi Maharani was doing.
It made me very proud to
tell everyone about the Tulasi seva team who is actually responsible for
making it possible.
Please accept my humble
obesciences unto your lotus feet Mother Rudrani.
Bhakta George
My
deepest condolences to the family and friends of Rudrani dd for
their pangs of separation. It had been almost thirty years since I
last heard any news of Rudrani dd and most of you, but neither she
nor you, nor the temple in Seattle where once we served together in
the service of Krsna and Srila Prabhupada have ever been long absent
from my thoughts, nor ever from my heart. I still have the copy of
Bhagavad Gita that Rudrani dd insisted that I take along with me,
“Something to read that will answer all your questions, Bhakta
George.” along with her instruction to “Chant Hare Krsna” and hers
and all of your hopes for me that one day that I might become a
devotee.
Although in the long years since then I have missed a few
rounds, I have never stopped chanting Hare Krsna, reading the words
of Srila Prabhupada, or practicing the lessons there that you taught
me, however imperfectly and due to your mercy more than my practice
it has had some effect. To her and to you my deep appreciation and
gratitude.
I am happy that Rudrani dd and others of you with whom
I served and whose names appear here again before me, for the first
time in ages, have been able to live out your lives together in the
“house” that you aided your beloved master to build, that you
have found safe harbors of havens amongst the storms that have
buffeted your movement. Perhaps one day we will meet again in that
place that your dearest Rudrani dd has gone to now, beyond the
farthest star there in Goloka Vrndaban. I have not
forgotten Krsna ever thanks to Rudrani dd and to you. Again, my
deepest condolences and appreciation.
Bhakta
George
Damodhar
Gopal Dasa
Once, a devotee was conveying to
me his desire to serve in the tulasi department.
Expressing a factor of inspiration to do this service, he
related the following incident: Recently, a visiting devotee,
who traveled to many ISKCON centers worldwide, mentioned in his
‘Sunday Feast’ lecture his appreciation for the beautiful plants
we had in our tulasi house. He remarked: “The persons in
charge of tulasi must be pure devotees!”
As Srila Prabhupada said, the
healthy growth of tulasi reflected the devotion of the
local devotees. Srimati Rudrani devi dasi’s devotion was
definitely a major ingredient in the tulasi plants’
wonderful development. Not only was tulasi, but I also
felt, as well as many others, nourished in her association by
witnessing her determination in Krishna consciousness, her
thoughtfulness, gentleness and kindness. I regret I didn’t have
more of her beneficial association while she was physically
amongst us.
Hoping to do some service pleasing
to her,
Damodar Gopal das
Chamari Devi
Dasi
I had the privilege of Mother Rudrani's association shortly after I
joined the temple, on her first visit to Bangalore. She stayed a few
days and I was overwhelmed by her enthusiasm to serve Lord Krishna
and Srila Prabhupada. Never dwelling on her painful bodily
condition, she was eager to encourage and appreciate my attempts to
serve. After that first time, she returned for a very brief visit
before she left India, and though we have hardly kept in touch, her
association has continued to inspire me all these years. Her
dedication to Srila Prabhupada, her unflinching devotion, unaffected
by her illness, inspired everyone who met her. Her ability to laugh inspite
of her illness revealed her utmost faith in Krishna's plan for her.
She was truly surrendered to His sweet will, and not at all
embittered by the physical pain she so stoically bore. Rather, she
used it as a means to detach herself from this body. She told me on
her first visit, that she moved into the temple at the age of 20,
with her vanity kit full of cosmetics; then she joked that Krishna
was teaching her through her illness that she was not her painful
body. The proof of her having pleased Krishna is evident in her
auspicious passing. She was a rare person, a shining example of how
we ought to dedicate ourselves in Krishna consciousness, against all
odds. All glories this wonderful Vaishnavi who touched our hearts
and lives so specially!
Chamari devi dasi, Bangalore
Geetha & Family
(Mayapur Dham)
Rudrani Prabhu,
A close friend for 12 years who was
always there for me.
You were always kind and helpful in
everyway I can think of.
Your support and positive outlook on
life has encouraged me and helped kept me going for all these years.
I was always inspired by your love and
dedication to the service of Tulasi Maharani where she has
flourished so wonderfully in Vancouver.
You have always helped me with
your good advice directing me towards my spiritual advancement I am
ever great-full
Being from Eastern Canada
and knowing your love for potatoes my husband, Madana Mohan das, my
daughter, Sita and I have been feasting on mash potatoes in your
honour for the last 2 days.
Someday when I can become
qualified to join you in the spiritual world we all can sit down
over prasadam and honor your association once again.
We cherish every moment we
spent with you and you will always be a part of my life.
Our Prayers and support to
Sananda Prabhu, Shantha, and family members.
Geetha and family (Mayapur Dham)
Vaisnavi DD &
Rohinikumar Das
Alachua
We had the great
fortune of having Mother Rudrani's friendship and guidance, she was
always there for us; from entertaining our family members during our
wedding (dressing my mom and mother in law in saris) to counseling me in
times of crisis.
She had everyone else's welfare over hers, even though she was
experiencing extreme pain, she would listen with compassion, never
complaining and shared her wisdom from Srila Prabhupada's teaching, she
was truly selfless.
An example of this is the day before she left this world, despite her
extreme condition, she made herself available by phone to friends who
wanted to speak with her for the last time. That was an emotional time
for me, all I could say was how much I love her, how she impacted my
life and how much I will miss her, in turn she said: "I love you too but
don't worry, I am just changing my body, like the Bhagavad Gita says!"
Then she spoke to my 7 year old son, whom she said, she had a special
connection with, as he also has had numerous health crisis, which
Rudrani truly empathized with.
And she confirmed it two days after her departure, when my son woke up
and told me that "Aunty Rudrani" and Tulasi came to see him in his
dream, which brought me hope that she will be looking after him.
Our family will greatly miss her association, her love and wisdom but we
are most inspired and happy for her to finally be free from the material
constraints and be reestablished in her eternal service to Srimati
Tulasi Devi and The Divine Couple.
With love,
Your servants Vaishnavi Devi dasi, Rohini-Kumar das and Narottam.
Sankaran
Unni (Rudrani's Nephew)
Rudrani Ammayi - In memory
After a lifetime of pain and suffering, Rudrani
Ammayi finally passed away on 11/10/2006.
Born in 1953 as Rebecca Flynn, she originally
hailed from Nova Scotia Canada.
Two
major things in her life are her faith and her struggle with her
disabilities.
Early in her life as a young woman, she was involved in horrific
car accident, which resulted in disabilities that plagued her
and racked her body with pain for the rest of her life. But in
spite of all that, she was always cheerful, brave and devout.
She was an ardent devotee of Lord Krishna having accepted the
Vaishnavism faith brought to the west by Srila Prabhupada.
My
earliest memories of her are way back in the mid 1980’s when I
was myself a young boy in the 6th or 7th
grade visiting my home during the vacations. At that time, I
would accompany Sukumaramman, himself a
Krishna devotee, to Rudrani’s home for their weekly pujas.
Perhaps the biggest attraction for a young boy was the delicious
coconut burfi’s and other prasadam items. But other than that,
was the fact that she was so genuinely affectionate even at that
time.
Later, she became my aunt, when she married Sukumaramman, and I
couldn’t have been happier that she was now my relative.
They then went to
Canada in the
late 1980’s. Both of them were frail, my uncle had several
health problems of his own and was a survivor of multiple
surgeries. Ammayi’s companion of several years, Santha was there
to accompany them and take care of her every need with tender
loving care.
In
Vancouver Canada, living as part of
the ISKCON community there, their devotion poured out in the
tender care of the Tulsi plants at the temple. The plants
flourished in two large green houses under their care.
Details of this endeavor can be found here –
http://btg.krishna.com/main.php?id=862
Years and years of pain and suffering finally
drew to a close. Her frail body could no longer take the effects
of the years of wear and tear and all the medication that she
had been forced to take. But her mind was as sharp as ever.
Surrounded by her husband, siblings, Santa, and other loved
ones, she continued to comfort them and advice them
philosophically. Finally in palliative care, heavily sedated,
after years of torture, her body finally held no more pain. As
the last moment drew near, she awoke, held the hand of her
beloved Santha and said “do you see Tulsi Devi”. After years of
devotion, had her beloved Tulsi Devi herself arrived, perhaps,
to escort her devotee on her final journey? Loudly she chanted
her beloved Maha mantra invoking Lord Krishna and gracefully
passed away.
Rudrani Ammayi – you will be missed.